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At first I didn't think I'd have a plan to be a complete fool. However, today I was wrong. I came to the conclusion that I'd fall over with enthusiasm when I saw myself in the nude. Let it be known that I was tastefully nude. And by tastefully, I mean an utter beauty, yup.... I am shocked still at the uncompromisingly cold drafts. Who knew liberation could be so enthusiastically simple and easily attainable. Anyway, it started with my friend begging me to blog about him being unreasonably obsessed with pet peeves. For example, discombobulated phalanges of the tarsals. For some, this could mean they stub their phalanges on random cold impenetrable objects that hurt bad. This is where the aforementioned foolish role begins. You see, I slipped on the cold, wet tiled linoleum surface covering. Yes, I was naked. I just so happened to catch the eyes of my unreasonably obsessed friend and his dog, Patches. Of course, while I fell on my face I also jabbed my TOES ON A CABINET! There you have the rest of the foolish experience played out by my silly goofy self. :) (Collaboration of dom and ME)
actually an autobiography.....
At times I think Evan Todtz is the greatest person that has ever roamed this planet. Then I think about John Legend and change my mind. Though it is possible that he is the greatest Caucasian I have ever met. The way that boy handles what life throws at him is simply astonishing. I don't know if something can be simple and astonishing at the same time but if it can happen, then Evan Todtz would be the one to do it. He really does succeed at whatever he does. An example of this greatness would be the way that man speaks. That's right. I said man. When he allows sounds to come out of his throat and through his lips it is a delight. He always has something clever to add. Whether the conversation includes global warming, Hilary Clinton, or something with a little more depth like pizza he has the brain to say what really matters. His humor conquers all. I don't kid about humor. It is of utmost importance in my life. I would die of utter boredom and droopy eye syndrome if were not for humor. For this, I am eternally grateful to the man that goes by the name of Evan Todtz.
Oh deary me, oh me oh my. The weekend started off well. A simple car ride to Peoria, IL with my obnoxiously loud friend who will remain unnamed due to her recent attraction to my lovable brother Nathanael. Once we arrived we realized we were so hungry it would be acceptable to compare us to those sad thin people that are known as Mischa, Mary-Kate, Ashley, and Kiera. So we proceeded to the nearest Steak and Shake. We walked in. The smell of the greasy yet satisfying food aroused my deepest senses causing to make quite a mistake. I ordered a heart attack. Better known and chili cheese fries and a double-sided chocolate mocha shake. So good going down, but not so good once it hit the insides that have to process. From here on out I, for some reason unknown to humankind, could not eat right. Here it the result: eight pounds. That's right folks. I returned home eight pounds heavier than when I left. ew.
Off to Hickville to watch big bad older brother Noah graduate. Its interesting that I described him this way. He is actually one of the best guys around. Did I mention I hate the direct effect of fruit on the body? The long term result is just so darn satisfying.
First and foremost I would like to warn all those who view this site that I am not obsessed with colons. I usually do not overuse them nor do I have a habit of using them in titles of my work. It just so happens that both posts I put up today have colons in the title. Please do not judge. Judgmental people aren't very well liked anyway, so consider this a favor. Now, back to the sharpie. Sharpie has, indeed, revolutionized. The basic black, is no longer acceptable. Even the emo kids refuse... and that is saying something. They know exactly what is appropriate and what is not. The colors of the rainbow are not good enough either. ROYGBIV is no longer in power. There are pastels and bolds and really hideous bodily fluid looking colors that apparently have overruled the colors God meant to be an inspiration after a good rain and a little sunshine. Don't get me started on the sharpie "mini". Not only do we have sharpie marker, sharpie dry erase, sharpie fine point, but now we have to deal with a miniature version of the famous sharpie. Its not good enough to clip one to your pocket or slide one in that nice cargo pant we all have tried to pull off at one time or another. No, they have to create a marker you can put on your key chain. You know, so when your driving you don't have to worry about searching through or purse and or man bag to find a sharpie to complete that doodle you were so set on finishing before you arrived at Auntie May's.
Indeed, this wonderful site is devoted to the one and only Megan Thorkildsen. She has been many things to me. A stranger, a swimmer, a hater, a laugher, a fashionista, an associate, a sister of a friend, a friend, a sister friend, and above all else an inspiration. Because of this woman many have been shamed, praised, and flattered on occasion. I have come to know her as a wonderful friend, a sexy, yet classy woman, and a badass biker. I do hope she is proud of this ever so spontaneous creation of a blog.
